Ages 13-18
Teen Mental Health Warning Signs
Look for change and duration, not intensity.
Teenagers are supposed to be moody, private and occasionally awful. What matters is a sustained change from their own baseline over weeks — that's the signal.
What's actually worrying
Any one of these in isolation might mean nothing. Several together, lasting more than two weeks, means it's time to act.
- Dropping the things they used to love, including friends.
- Big changes in sleep or appetite in either direction.
- Falling grades alongside withdrawal.
- Long sleeves in summer, unexplained marks, new secrecy about their body.
- Giving possessions away, or talking about being a burden.
Ask the direct question
Asking about suicide does not plant the idea. It is one of the most protective things you can do, and it has to be asked plainly.
- "Are you thinking about killing yourself?" — those words, not a euphemism.
- Stay calm whatever the answer, and don't fill the silence.
- If the answer is yes, don't leave them alone and get help today.
- Remove or lock away medication, alcohol and anything else dangerous.
Getting help without losing them
Framing matters enormously. Therapy presented as a punishment or a verdict gets refused; presented as normal support, it usually gets accepted.
- Start with your doctor and the school's pastoral or counselling service.
- Give them a say in who they see.
- Tell them what you will and won't share with the therapist.
Self-harm
If you find evidence, react calmly. Shock and anger drive it further underground, and secrecy is the dangerous part.
- Don't demand promises to stop — that just creates hidden relapses.
- Treat wounds practically and without drama.
- Get professional help; this is not one you manage alone.
What to say
Opening the conversation
You haven't seemed like yourself for a few weeks. I'm not asking you to explain it — I just want you to know I've noticed.
Asking directly
Have you been having thoughts about ending your life? You can tell me. I can handle it.
Suggesting help
I want to get you someone to talk to who isn't me. You can help pick them, and it doesn't mean anything's wrong with you.
Where parents get burned
- Waiting to see if it passes when it's already been a month.
- Reacting with panic or anger, which teaches them to conceal.
- Promising to keep a safety risk secret from the other parent or a doctor.
When to loosen up: In an emergency, or if there's an immediate risk to life, contact emergency services now. This page is general guidance and not a substitute for medical or psychological care.
Your kid isn't the one in the playbook.
Tell Beacon what's actually happening in your house and it'll tell you which of these rules to hold and which one to drop.
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